Here For You

I think I forget that I’m worth it.

Currently, I’m struggling between giving myself a shot and pulling myself down.

It’s a hard argument to have with yourself on an everyday basis. On the one hand, you know you’re an interesting, lively person who deserves every good thing that comes your way. On the other hand, a small voice whispers in your ear about how you might not be pretty enough or interesting enough.

I get lost in my inner dialogue and my inner vision of myself.

So, I’m here to try and give everyone I know that little push towards the better life.

You are good enough. You are definitely pretty enough.

You’re more interesting, clever, witty and hilarious than you give yourself credit for.

People always tell you to shut up that little derogatory voice in your head but I think you should let it tell it’s little story, incite it’s little judgement’s and then tell it it’s wrong.

That little voice is you. Tell yourself you are wrong. Tell yourself you love you!

You deserve as much as you work for, so work for it!

Don’t give up the fight before it begins, life is here for you. I am here for you.

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Extraordinary Love

Sometimes it strikes me right to the heart knowing that magic doesn’t exist.

Knowing that there will be no lightning strike, no sudden and unexplainable reason I can read someones thoughts.

It makes me sadder than thinking I’ll go my whole life without my soulmate. All the stories, all the imagination that goes into our mystical worlds. It’s there to inspire us, to help guide us.

What I wouldn’t give for it to be real. A whimsical wish considering that’s how many of the stories begin and then the protagonist later wishes to rescind that thought.

Still, I am reminded in my dreams that even when I was little “Superhero” was what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Dreams are probably as close as I will get in my lifetime but if there is a day when we have evolved or made ourselves extraordinary, I hope we don’t waste it.

I hope in our time we don’t make the road to the extraordinary harder, with our petty struggles and unnecessary hardships.

We are human above all else. Race, gender, love. These may define us but they don’t segregate us.

Maybe the extraordinary quality of our generation will be our love, if we let it.

That Empty Kind of Love

Sorrow is like an ache in my chest.

A black hole of emptiness inside me, stretching through to my fingertips and toes.

Loss clouds my eyes, dulling my senses till there is nothing left.

The bass echoes through my limbs as I twirl in an room full of empty people.

Bodies jostling, shining with sweat, as I try and feel something.

This is why we are here.

To feel something else, something we can’t give ourselves.

It’s an empty love but love nonetheless.

Lights flash, garishly illuminating our swaying bodies, our blank eyes reflecting red, blue, and yellow.

Reaching up towards an empty ceiling, we crow with toxic excitement.

The drums beat with our hearts, taking away our inhibitions.

This is what we want.

This is why we are here.

We are lost but we are together.

Sister

I was born first to help you through the hard times, to give you a gentle hand when you were in need.

You came into the world and didn’t even need me.

You were tough, beautiful, and opinionated, you didn’t need me at all.

It threw me a bit, I didn’t know how to respond to you.

It was like giving advice to an elder sibling, they just look down their nose and laugh.

I still try. I live my life, still thinking of ways to help you along.

Whether it’s something I see that would brighten your day, or something I know that would help you out.

Sometimes, you ignore my advice or throw it in my face. I don’t know how to react.

It comes out in words and actions that aren’t how I truly feel.

In the end I know you still need me. Even if you don’t know it yourself.

Once, you told me all the women in your life have always disappointed you.

I always hated that you were let down by so many people, myself included.

So, I’ll be here. Telling you my stories and experiences. Maybe one day you’ll listen and talk to me too.

Figments

It’s like an explosion. One second I’m fine and then next second you’re everywhere, pervading my mind with your smile and kind eyes.

I didn’t ask for this. I don’t mean for it to be here, ready to replay in my mind as soon as you notice me again.

Lying in my bed thinking that we could have a future, continuously hoping it’s not a figment of my imagination.

As hard as I try, I can’t resist it. Your smile. Even in my memories it lights up your face, a contagious sight that spreads across my own face and warms my heart.

Please don’t be my figment, be my reality.